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78bronco
08-08-2012, 12:54 AM
RECTUM STRETCHER

(if you don't laugh at this one, there is something wrong.)

While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'

'And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ' he asked.

'You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge...'

Traffic Ticket - $95.00
Court Costs - $45.00
Look on the Cop's Face.................PRICELESS

1949d100
08-08-2012, 08:57 AM
That is great!

Happypants
08-08-2012, 11:00 AM
Haha awesome!!

BleepinJeep
08-08-2012, 11:21 AM
Good one!

crazybushcreature
08-08-2012, 06:05 PM
hahaha nice

78bronco
08-09-2012, 12:11 AM
thanks i thought so too

ginge-rook
08-09-2012, 10:15 AM
hahah awesome